I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
