Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
