maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
