She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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