Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
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