Midget sex pt 2 tonight
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize
