the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
