Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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