nut hugger
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize