So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize