belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
sarcasm needs its own font
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Randomize