kristin has been a bad kristin
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
