So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Randomize