i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
It was like giving head to a cactus.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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