i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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