did you get engaged???
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize
