love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
These Attractive Criminals Got Modeling Contracts After Getting Arrested
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I need to calm my uterus...