I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.