I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
You may now shotgun with the bride
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest