belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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