I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize