Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
