I think im going to throw up on grandma
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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