We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize