It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
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