One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
