I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize