OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
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She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
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