he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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