this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
