new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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