due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Randomize
