Don't you send me to vm
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
