lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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