Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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