So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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