3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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