Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
