hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I don't deserve a penis
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
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