as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize