I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
