I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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