So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize
