You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
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