i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
