ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
