when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize