the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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