Texts From Last Night

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  (702): View more from Nevada

  Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??

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  (702): Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks?? http://tfl.nu/ct6g
  Replies (15) Good night (2748) Bad night (852)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.

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  (904): You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus. http://tfl.nu/zy6a
  Replies (37) Good night (4709) Bad night (812)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.

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  (978): I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night. http://tfl.nu/sljh
  Replies (7) Good night (2886) Bad night (605)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.

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  (412): im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again. http://tfl.nu/heac
  Replies (38) Good night (4407) Bad night (886)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.

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  (443): Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit. http://tfl.nu/mbv0
  Replies (8) Good night (4618) Bad night (912)
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  (807): View more from Ontario

  Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?

  (1-807): View more from Ontario

  Just flip the mattress, it erases all

  (807): View more from Ontario

  Done and done

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  (807): Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town? (1-807): Just flip the mattress, it erases all (807): Done and done http://tfl.nu/aezq
  Replies (100) Good night (2865) Bad night (7601)
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  (806): View more from Texas

  with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.

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  (806): with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible. http://tfl.nu/qot7
  Replies (31) Good night (10209) Bad night (1172)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.

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  (+44): The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them. http://tfl.nu/yb6x
  Replies (20) Good night (705) Bad night (3747)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign

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  (703): the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign http://tfl.nu/m52j
  Replies (10) Good night (5007) Bad night (1141)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake

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  (503): We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake http://tfl.nu/m3xg
  Replies (13) Good night (3327) Bad night (783)
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.

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  (307): I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street. http://tfl.nu/3ofi
  Replies (3) Good night (1596) Bad night (545)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now

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  (907): You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now http://tfl.nu/vnkw
  Replies (7) Good night (1170) Bad night (494)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.

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  (360): We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat. http://tfl.nu/nbay
  Replies (8) Good night (551) Bad night (1478)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver

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  (352): Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver http://tfl.nu/yics
  Replies (7) Good night (1146) Bad night (508)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.

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  (720): His dick is so big it could be an arm rest. http://tfl.nu/aqho
  Replies (2) Good night (877) Bad night (230)

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