We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
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I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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