I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
