So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
